Alive, or Just Breathing?
by FoodAndWifi
Summary: The war between the Storm Hawks and Cyclonia has ended and the Atmos has been saved. Everyone should be happy. But Aerrow has suffered from depression ever since the war ended and he feels like he only has one choice. *rated for language, adult themes.


**A/N: I need to stop with these ideas. Anyway, this will probably be only a few chapters long, so it would be kind of a short story. Aerrow and the kids will be 16 in this fic so they've defeated the Cyclonians and the rest of the obvious. No, my OC will NOT be in this fic. A fair warning, you may need some tissues depending on how sensitive you are.**

**Chapter One.**

Sighing, the young knight threw away another sheet of paper. He had been up all night trying to write down what he needs to say. The others were sound asleep, even Radarr. Aerrow never felt happiness anymore, despite the fake smile he would plaster on his face everyday. He knew that defeating the Cyclonians wouldn't bring back his family, but it would save other families, so why isn't Aerrow happy? Aerrow silently cried for a few moments before writing on a new sheet of paper.

_Before I begin, just know this is nobody's fault; this is my own choice._

_Finn, I couldn't ask for a better sharpshooter. Of course, you pissed every one of us off at one point, but you've always had my back and I couldn't thank you enough for that._

_Junko, if it weren't for you, we wouldn't be here today. Not only would we have died in the Wastelands, but also the Cyclonians would have been still here and making everyone else's lives hell. Your caring personality got us here. Thank you, Junko. I know how upset you'll be that I'm gone, but stay strong._

_Stork, at first, you seemed like some wacko dude. Despite how we all underestimated your inventions, those inventions saved our asses countless times. You also saved us in other ways and I couldn't imagine the team without you._

_Piper, I'm leaving you in charge. I know you felt like the unfitting gear and we never followed your plans entirely and I'm so sorry for that. I guess a beautiful, intelligent girl like you shouldn't be with a reckless, idiotic person like me. Piper, I love you, not as in a friend or a best friend, more than that. I wish I had the guts to tell you sooner, but you would only see me as a friend. I'm too much of a damn coward. Take care, Piper._

_Radarr, this will be so hard to write. You have been my best friend since day one. I know how you will feel knowing that your best friend is gone, but please, please, PLEASE don't ever give up because I'm gone. I always will be your best friend and I wish nothing but the best for you._

_Don't be sad because I chose to end my life. The stars will still appear, the sun will still come out, the seasons will still change, and I'm just another damned person in the Atmos. I'm sorry everyone._

_Goodbye, Storm Hawks._

_-Aerrow_

Wiping the tears that have fallen, Aerrow tucked the note he had written in an envelope. He flipped the envelope over and wrote '_PLEASE READ_'. He rose from his seated position and took the note out to the bridge; he tossed the envelope onto the round briefing table before walking out into the hangar bay. He started up his skimmer and took off. Aerrow began to ponder about how his life will end.

Piper was startled awake when she heard the sound of a skimmer taking off. She hopped out of bed and walked out onto the bridge; she noticed the other guys were coming out too, with the exception of Aerrow.

"Why did Aerrow take off in the middle of the night?" Finn complained.

Piper looked around the bridge and noticed a note was left on the briefing table; she picked it up and said, "He left a note."

"It's probably him telling us that he can't sleep and he's going out for a rip, so I wouldn't read it," Finn chuckles.

Piper let out a sigh in annoyance; her and Finn's squabble never ended. "You never know, it doesn't hurt to read it."

"Hello Aerrow, what are you up to this late at night?" The clerk at the Atmosia pharmacy asked.

"Um, Junko has another tooth ache," Aerrow lied as he handed the clerk a bottle of pain pills.

"Oh, well I hope his tooth feels better. That'll be ten dollars please."

Aerrow handed the elderly man ten dollars, thanked him, and then left the pharmacy. Aerrow's next destination was an uncharted terra nearby.

Piper carefully took the note out of the envelope and began to read. Her face changed as she realized what Aerrow was doing.

"No," she whispered as she dropped the note, "no, no, NO!"

"What is it?" Finn asked.

"It's Aerrow, he's going to kill himself!" Piper cried.

Radarr made a distressed noise and Finn began to laugh, "That's ridiculous, Aerrow is too happy to do that," he said as he picked up the note. His face expression changed from amusement to worry as he read the note, "Oh shit, you're not joking."

"We gotta go find him, fast!" Junko shouted.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Piper asked as she turned on her heel to walk to the hangar, Radarr followed close behind.

As Aerrow landed on ground he looked around the area to see no one in sight. He got off his skimmer and cried in his hands for a moment. Once his sobs got controlled, he drew one of his energy blades and activated it. After a moment's hesitation, he dug the edge of the blade into his wrist; blood began to seep out of the wound as he let out a cry in pain. When he released the blade, Aerrow then picked up his bottle of pain pills and popped off the cap. He lifted the bottle to his lips and began swallowing the pills as if he was drinking water. When he felt he had enough he stopped and lowered the bottle of pills.

"Hi, have you seen Aerrow?" Piper asked the clerk at the pharmacy on Terra Atmosia. The team went out on a lookout mission for Aerrow. Stork went one way, Junko and Finn the other, and that left Piper and Radarr here.

"Yes, he just stopped here only minutes ago. He got a bottle of pain pills then left."

_Oh no._

"Do you know where he went?" Piper asked in desperation.

"I'm afraid not, sorry," the clerk answered.

"Alright, thank you," Piper says then speed-walks out the store with Radarr hot on her heels and hops onto her heliscooter. After a moment, they were off the terra, still searching for Aerrow. Minutes later, Piper saw Aerrow's skimmer in the distance. She flew down towards the piece of land. She pressed her fingertips to the radio. "Guys, I found Aerrow's skimmer on an uncharted terra nearby Terra Atmosia so he's close by, you guys should come quick."

Piper landed her heliscooter and looked around the land, hoping to find Aerrow still alive. Radarr made a cry out of despair and Piper knew this couldn't be good. She looked in the same direction as Radarr and saw a sight she dreaded; Aerrow was laying motionless approximately ten feet from his skimmer. His eyes had fallen shut, his wrist was smeared red and an open bottle of pills lay next to his hand.

"Aerrow!" Piper screamed and ran next to the unconscious form to see if he was breathing or even still alive. As she got closer, she noticed Aerrow's cheeks were tear-stained.

She knelt down next to him and checked for a pulse, it was weak, but still there. His breathing was short and shallow. Tears began to fill her eyes as she sat Aerrow's head on her lap and started stroking his hair.

"Aerrow, please stay with us," Piper sobbed.

Just as she said that, Finn came in, "Did you find him?"

"Yes, please come quick, he already made an attempt and I don't know how much time he has left," Piper sobbed.

"Shit. We're almost there," Finn says.

"Please be quick," Finn hung off the receiver and Piper looked at Aerrow and continued to sob, "please Aerrow, you can't do this to us!"

There Piper was, with an almost lifeless Aerrow's head laying on her lap, and the strong, determined, fearless navigator was sobbing like a five year old who just lost their favorite toy. The minutes felt like hours to her before the Condor arrived. She was praying that Aerrow wouldn't leave.


End file.
